Singing with Angel

One of my most cherished memories is singing with Mom and listening to her sing and play her guitar. She wrote over 80 worship songs and she loved to play her guitar and sing to the Lord. She would not only play when we were visiting them or they visiting us, but we also had the opportunity to lead worship together at the women’s retreats we held at various churches.

You can imagine my delight when I had the pleasure of singing with my precious Angel this weekend at church.

She’s been talking about singing with me for a long time, but every time she would change her mind and decide she would be too scared to be up on stage. Well, for the past few weeks she’s been asking and asking and it seemed like this time was different – like she was really ready.

Over Thanksgiving weekend was when I realized she really wanted to do it and so I asked our worship director about openings coming up in the next few weeks. I had thought about asking him about Sunday, December 7th, since Danelle and Jim would be here. But I decided not to, as it was such short notice and I figured there was already something planned.

I couldn’t believe it when I asked him and he said that he actually had an opening for Sunday December 7th! Thank you Lord! Although, that meant we had to get busy on a song!

We found one that had such an amazing message and also was pretty easy. I made Angel a copy and she got to work listening to it over and over. At first she couldn’t really get the notes but after a few days she came back and she was pretty much right on! I was so proud of her. And she was so excited.

Sunday morning we were up bright and early to do sound checks at 7:30 am. Whenever I sing or do drama or speak I always get really nervous right before going on, but then once I’m started I’m fine. Well little miss Angel didn’t have any of that. She was SO excited and confident and hilarious! I wasn’t nervous at all because she calmed me right down!

I realized after we had sang that I didn’t think about Mom or Dad once. At least not in a sad way. Instead my heart was so full of joy that I had the opportunity to sing with my Angel. A few months ago I told my counselor that I felt like I would never feel joy again. I’m so thankful that God is bringing healing and giving me joy again.

Thankfully I thought to ask Pat to record it, so you can see my precious Angel in her debut.


Don’t worry, you’ll see much more of her – she now plans to be a professional singer when she grows up. :)


A picture is worth a thousand words. And smiles.

(Disclaimer – these pictures are only a very small representation of our life. I have chosen to omit the pictures of my dining room table filled with papers and books and Lego pieces and crumbs and half empty glasses of milk from two days ago, pictures of my bedroom with a bed that is nicely made covered in clothes, both dirty and clean, and a kitchen with dirty dishes in places where dirty dishes shouldn’t be.)

~This girl.


Seriously, can she get any cuter? Two days and counting until we get to kiss those chubby cheeks!

~The other night I was walking down the hallway past Angel’s room and saw this:


Hahaha. I don’t have many words for this one – just smiles. Love my girl!

~I’ve posted lots of notes around the house – God’s word and positive affirmations… “I am loved,” “In this moment I am ok,” “I will never leave you or forsake you.” The kids wanted to write their own cards and this is what they wrote:


This one is Angel’s – I am never alone.


And Caleb’s – God is loved with our heart.

~Every year we pick out an ornament for the kids, an ornament for Grama and Papa and an ornament for our family.

The year our family ornament was actually three – peace, joy and hope. Three things that we have renewed in our hearts this year.



(Ooops. No yoj around here, just joy!)


This is Caleb’s – he’s all about the turtles this year.


Angel picked out one with two kitties – to represent Flower and Cheetah who now live with their aunt Nellie. When we got home we realized that she had picked out a kitty one last year too. Which is ok but she loves her kitties!


~One of the best things about Thanksgiving weekend was vegging out with my kiddos.


Good picture.


Creepy picture.

~Please be in prayer for these two, especially on Saturday.


Actually you should have been praying for them on the day this picture was taken. I think they were watching a Bears game. Hahaha, sorry Jim!

Jim and his baby girl are flying to South Dakota! I’m so proud of Jim. Granted Cleo is especially cute and a pretty good baby, but still as a new parent I would have been pretty stressed. And pray for Leana too as she sends them off. Thankfully Leana’s brother and sister-in-law are flying to Florida from South Africa on Saturday and so she will have a good week with them!

~This guy.


The kids call him Elf on the Shelf, which is really what he is. But we call him Jesus’ helper. We’ve been trying to do things that will give us an opportunity to talk about God and Jesus and the reason we celebrate Christmas. However after three days of spiritual lessons, I think the kids were getting a little annoyed with the Elf on the Shelf. Last night I asked Pat to take care of the elf and he came up with this pose on the Kleenex box. Kinda creepy, right.

This morning when the kids saw him, Angel said, “What’s so special about the Kleenex box?” Hahaha. I guess what we’ve been talking about the past few days has been sinking in!

~I was so excited to come across this the other day:


That’s right! It’s a color by number coloring book! Color by number is one of my most favorite things in the entire world. I’m not very good at figuring out what colors to use on a regular coloring sheet, but it’s hard to find color by number that is a little more difficult than what a 4-year old could do.

~One of my worksheets from treatment:


Notice number 14 – I wish I could move to Florida! Some day, right Patrick!?

~Ok, if you must, here’s one more picture of Cleo baby:


If that doesn’t make you smile, I don’t know what will!


Graduation Day

Tomorrow I will be graduating from the outpatient Partial Hospital Program (PHP). It’s otherwise known as discharge day, but graduation day sounds so much better, don’t you think? In case you haven’t seen my previous posts, the PHP is a program for those suffering from severe depression and anxiety. The first two weeks are full-time, […]

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The one with all the eating and relaxing and chasing tumbleweeds


It was a great Thanksgiving weekend. Although the kids (and their parents) are ready to get back on schedule tomorrow! Thursday we didn’t have Pat’s family coming over until supper. It was awesome! We stayed in our pj’s until about 1:00, watching movies and just hanging out. Pat ran to the store, for what I […]

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Counting the reasons


A large part of my treatment and healing the past month has involved battling thought distortions with God’s word, positive affirmations and remembering all I have to be grateful for. This weekend I’ll be singing on praise team at church, the first time in a long time as even thinking about it the past 6 […]

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